The Awakening
I have a feather to fluff. Why do you humans feel the INCESSANT NEED to use inexcusably loud tools on Saturday mornings?! Not only are these items almost always VERY SCARY…they also disrupt a feline’s much-needed beauty rest. Case in point: This morning, after a late night of cartoon reruns and fancy feast, I found […]
Heat Wave
I’ve been trying to keep still and quiet not only because of the “sweater incident” but great goblets of fire it’s been hot! I don’t remember the last time I have experienced this kind of heat (well vaguely, I know it involved South Beach and a misguided attempt to sunbathe…ah, youthful indiscretions). But, seriously…it’s an […]
Circumstantial Evidence
Psst! Hey guys it’s me…but don’t say my name too loud. I’m currently on the lam for a crime that I may or may not have committed. Apparently, Boss Man is upset that his favorite raspberry cashmere sweater is now a shredded disaster…and has the audacity to think I may be the one to blame. […]
Going (Health) Nuts
The torture continues. I’ve lost count of the days maybe weeks since the humans started rationing out my treats like I’m some sort of prisoner…which apparently I am. Here sits Max, a prisoner of his own appetite. I’ve been trying to distract myself by tormenting the small creature in the back office. I’ve done meditation, […]
Fittin’ Up My Fluff
As you know, I’ve recently been placed on an involuntary “kitty diet”. As of today, my attempts at a feeding sabotage have proven less than effective which puts me in the unfortunate position of rethinking my options. Naturally, I would love to continue eating as much as I want and living a life of feline […]
You Have To Ask
Are you a cat person? Or a dog person? I understand that centuries, humans have asked this of themselves and of others…with the (not so subtle) character-assessment undertones attached. While some proudly claim an equal affinity to both creatures…we all know that, in truth, such an equilibrium of taste is not possible. For, to equate […]
The Suds Max Style
The Suds Max Style Apparently my Zen focus on life has done nothing to whittle my waist. While I still find myself the epitome of fabulous health and striking good looks, it appears that my humans do not agree. I had one sneeze and a cough and suddenly I am stuffed into a carrier and […]
Soul Cat
Hello Fans, Another week has begun and along with it, a new Max. I have been reflecting deeply on the state of my personal affairs, and the meaning of life. Recently, while catching an episode of My Cat From H*** on the Animal Planet it all became clear…I, Max, don’t ever want to end up like […]
The Return
Greetings to those fortunate enough to be called friends and all others, After the humans realized I have no understanding of the word negotiate and agreed to my demands, excuse me I misspoke, contractual conditions; I, Max, have decided to re-enter the blogging world. It is true, I have missed the adoration of my fans. […]
The Introduction
It’s been almost a year since me and my best friend were forcibly removed from our palm tree lined, constant sunshine, pool in the back yard home in Tampa, Florida and driven to this place they call Anderson, South Carolina. Upon our arrival, my best friend was catnapped by some lady. The last I heard […]